I don't own you.

“If you love somebody- set them free.”

Sting

 

The text reply only had 5 words, but I knew instantly that for the last 6 months, I had been slowly suffocating our relationship.
“I don’t own you Jennifer.”

Coming out of a 17 year marriage, I have been owned and owning for a long time. ..for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health……till death do us part.  The truth is I no longer want to own, but the concept is a bit foreign to me.   I’ve been “owned” since I was a child by my parents, men, teachers, bosses….. even training schedules!  And being in control means that you own too.

I love the freeing quote of Anais Nin:  “You can’t save someone, you can only love them.”

Choosing ease means that we no longer try to own or save people.  We love them. We respect them.  We give and trust and have faith that the relationship is just as it should be in this moment.  We don’t worry about the future.  We live for today.  We LOVE for today. 

 Audrey Hepburn said that “the best thing to hold onto in life is each other,” but I don’t believe that she was referring to the kind of choke hold we can put the ones we care about most.  I believe she meant we should hold on to our humanness.  Hold on to happiness.  Hold on to love. 

If you love someone, set them free. If they come back.....then how lucky are you?  :)