Wednesday, April 30, 2014

I surrender.

"And when the broken hearted people
Living in the world agree
There will be an answer, let it be
For though they may be parted
There is still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer, let it be

 The Beatles

For me, it was the dramatic grand funk of the ages. Well, one of them at least. 
Two weeks of mascara smearing, red eyed, snotty nosed sobbing over a broken relationship (long distance doesn't play fair)- followed by a fruitless job search.  Oh yeah, and THEN I was told I would be teaching kindergarten if I stayed at my school next year.  Yay.
None of this was part of my fun loving, adventure seeking, mind-stimulating plan.  Haven't I made that clear?  
The hits just kept on coming..... and I was pissed.  Again.  At God.

And here I sit tonight. 
Still pissed but Surrendering. 
Allowing the present to be.

Eckert Tolle tells us to "Accept- then act.  Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it. Make it your friend and ally, not your enemy.
This will miraculously transform your whole life."  

Damn.  I could sure go for a big swig of miraculous transformation right now; but nobody can "fix" this for me so please don't try.  I'm hanging out with the pain body, making observations and taking notes.   It's my turn to embrace the suck.

Don't worry- I'll find my way through.  

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